My Obituary

The Dead Beat: Lost Souls, Lucky Stiffs, and the Perverse Pleasures of Obituaries
by Marilyn Johnson

As I flew home today I listened to an interview of Johnson's new book "The Dead Beat". This book has been on my "TO READ" list since it came out earlier this year but the library hasn't received it yet!!

What I found interesting was the fact that the New York Times has a room of files of "future" obituaries for people who are super famous and might die tomorrow, or for those who wrote their own obituaries before their death.

And since THIS IS MY SUPER BAD DAY! I thought about what my obituary would say:

Kimberly Elizabeth died of stress-overload in her car on her way home today. She was born in Sunnyside, WA in 1979 to Larry and Carol. She loved to read and loved "Anne of Green Gables" as a child. She graduated from Prosser High School where she was active in theater and cheerleading. After a brief stint as a SeaGal she attended Washington State University where she graduated with two Bachelors degrees in Women's Studies and Comparative Ethnic Studies. It was at WSU that she met her best friend Woosellio and from there they attended the University of Idaho where Kim was working on her Masters of Science in Geography. Kim's other greatest friends include her poochies Ocean, Pixel, Olive, and Spot all of which kept her feet warm.
When she wasn't in school Kim could be found traveling, but only to islands although she did not plan this and has nothing against the mainland. She believes that she learned to laugh in the Philippines, think in England, dance in Cuba, and eat in Japan. She enjoyed antiques, collecting books, stupid jokes and movies, and napping. She is survived by her fabulous boyfriend Kermit whom she couldn't live without, Woosellio, Ocean, Pixel, Olive, Spot, her dear longtime friends Dan, Eric, Masa, Forrest, and Kathy and many other special friends. She is preceded in death by her favorite aunt Beulah Lee, her grandmothers Margaret and Jackie, and her beloved dog Bruno.


I actually feel better now!